Blog Archives

July 27, 2011

Corey Patterson to make triumphant return to NLC

ESPN is reporting a complicated trade that’s resulted in, among other things, the addition of Corey Patterson to the St. Louis Cardinals’ roster:

CHICAGO — The Chicago White Sox traded pitcher Edwin Jackson and utilityman Mark Teahen to the Toronto Blue Jays.

The White Sox will receive reliever Jason Frasor and pitching prospect Zach Stewart.

A short time later Wednesday, the Blue Jays turned around and traded Jackson to the St. Louis Cardinals in an eight player deal that netted Toronto Colby Rasmus, sources told ESPN The Magazine’s Buster Olney.

The Cards sent Rasmus Trever Miller, Brian Tallet and P.J. Walters to the Jays for Jackson, Marc Rzepczynski, Octavio Dotel and Corey Patterson.

The clear winner in this trade is, of course, Colby Rasmus, who finally gets to escape from under the malevolent thumb of Tony LaRussa.

December 10, 2008

Not Even Bora$ Can Help Him Now

Everyone’s favorite crappy outfielder Corey Patterson has switched agents. Apparently, Patterson had been represented by Scott Boras, the agent notorious for filling his client’s wallets with all sorts of mad cash. But apparently not even the mighty Boras can magically turn a 23% Not-Out Percentage into a Major League Baseball contract, and C-Pat is looking for greener pastures.

A year too late, I’m afraid.

October 7, 2008

Reds Say Patterson Won’t be Back

“CINCINNATI — Corey Patterson’s return to the Reds in 2009 already seemed unlikely as this season closed. Now, it’s official,” says Mark Sheldon in this story on

I’m glad that the return of Patterson in 2009 seemed unlikely to someone. It seemed as likely as hell to me.

Other tidbit of interest from this story:

Expect the club to make serious efforts to bring back reliever David Weathers and utility player Jerry Hairston Jr.

Whether these are good potential moves depends on what the Reds intentions are. If they’re padding the roster with decent performers, or trying to gain future favor with Weathers’ son, then it’s cool.

September 25, 2008

Dusty Baker Wants You to Know Something

Dusty Baker is known for having a serious blindness to the playing abilities of Corey Patterson. He had it when he managed in Chicago, and so it came as no surprise when Patterson joined the Reds shortly after Baker was hired.

No reason for Baker’s cluelessness about Patterson’s ineptitude as a player has ever been put forth. But if you were thinking it was because Patterson was banging Baker’s daughter, think again. John Fay has the details.

“She hasn’t even been to Cincinnati,” Baker said. “This is so far out of line. It’s hurtful to my wife and daughter. How can people stoop that low? I don’t know who started it. But I’ve been hearing from fans, players, announcers.”

So there you go. One reason checked of the list of possible reasons for Baker’s managerial incompetence. Still left in play: blindness, severe brain trauma, man crush, and toothpick wound.