It's Wednesday evening, and I'm sitting outside the Tropical Breeze Resort & Spa, taking advantage of their Wi-Fi. I started out over at the Daiquiri Deck, but when they couldn't find a table for a party of one even though the dining room was half empty and turned the gawd-awful music in the bar from 3 to 8 while I was waiting, I realized it just wasn't meant to be. Girlfriend needs a little peace and quiet for her blogging.

This is way better anyway. There are quite the characters walking by on the sidewalks, and so instead of catching up on the game wraps that I am behind on again, I'm taking a moment to tell you about it.

A rather top-heavy woman just jugged, I mean, jogged by with about 10% of her total body area covered in Spandex. I barely restrained the urge to do a slack-jawed double take, though I did sneak a peek when she jogged back the other direction later. I've seen lots of skin since I've been here, shown some of it too, but she was taking it to a new level.

Not long after her a man in Spandex rode by on his bicycle, thankfully significantly more covered by his attire. Bulging out of it, but at least covered by it.

An olive green VW Bus just turned the corner, coughing smoke. Not saying from where.

A middle-aged married couple just walked out into the road in front of oncoming traffic. (People do this all the time here, by the way. There are signs posted all over the place admonishing drivers that if they don't yield the right-of-way, they'll be faced with a $118.50 fine. Apparently the $118 fine just wasn't getting the message across.)

Anyway, they yelled back to the half-dozen adolescent boys following them who also ran out in the middle of the road to cross the street. Over a white t-shirt trimmed in sequins, the woman wore a pink cardigan, also decked out in sequins. Seriously, are sequins ever in style outside of a cocktail party or the seventh grade?

An elderly couple is making their way past me as I type this. The man is moving with the aid of a walker and just stopped short to tell his wife, “My pants are falling down.” He then stood there while she slowly made her way around him and hitched them up for him.

A bus (the public transit kind, not the smokey VW kind) just dropped someone off at The Beach Club across the street. The bus system here is called SCAT, which just wouldn't have made me snicker before internet porn made every fetish known to every person who did a Google search. I very much look forward to the Google hits I get off this post, in fact.

So you can tell that Siesta Village in Sarasota is really a happening place. And if you find yourself in the area of the Tropical Breeze Resort and Spa before I head for home after the game on Saturday, bring some of that VW Bus action over my way.

While our lovely and talented hostess, RHM, is in Sarasota hobnobbing with celebrities, soakin' up those nice warm rays, and groovin' to the music of Bronson Arroyo, somebody's gotta keep the news on this here weblog up to date. Therefore, without further delay:

P Brian Shackelford, IF William Bergolla, and IF Matt Kata have been optioned to Louisville today.

No surprises here. Shackelford never seemed to find command of his pitches all spring. Narron's harped about command all spring, so the writing's been on the wall for Brian, and now it's been his undoing. Kata came to the organization too late to have any real shot at making the parent club. Bergolla was destined for Louisville all along, but had to play in a game first - you can't option a guy when he's hurt, and Bergolla had the high groin sprain since February.

I see that the Marlins released former Red Lenny Harris today. If Krivsky signs him to a minor league contract, I'm going to explode.

- HMZ -

I got quite a jolt of excitement this morning when I saw the DHL man flip a package onto the doorstep of the condo where we're staying. Now, even as I type this, I'm listening to Bronson Arroyo's CD Covering the Bases. I'll be giving a review after I've listened to it a couple dozen more times. In other word, later tonight or possibly tomorrow morning.

The Reds took down the Pirates on Monday, 4-7 in Sarasota.

Wayne “Kriv-dog” Krivsky sat three rows in front of us and was only on his cell phone two or three times. He disappeared from his seat for the third and part of the fourth inning. Apparently he was actually interested in seeing the game as he remained in his seat after returning, keeping score in his book and timing people with his stopwatch.

Lefty Eric Milton got the start and made it look easy in the top of the first. He took out Chris Duffy, Freddy Sanchez, and Sean Casey quickly, despite the PA playing “Welcome Back, Kotter” for Casey and the crowd cheering like crazy. Unfortunately, the Reds were similarly disinteresting in the bottom of the first.

Milton struck out Craig Wilson before walking Joe Randa to provide the runner that Jose Hernandez would need to launch a two-run home run to center field. Milton would get another strike out in the inning, though.

In the bottom of the second, Edwin Encarnación doubled off the center (not left) field wall. Scott Hatteberg moved him over with a single to center field, setting up Javy Valentín for a sacrifice fly. Milton flied to right field where the fielder couldn't handle the ball, but Felipe Lopez struck out to strand him on first and Hatteberg on third.

The top of the third saw another home run from the Pirates, this time a solo shot from Craig Wilson. But Griffey was ready to match it in the bottom of the inning with a two-run number after Rich Aurilia walked. Griffey's home run cleared the batter's eye and caused much oohing and ahhing.

Milton got two more strike outs in the top of the fourth and went three-up, three-down in the top of the fifth to finish out his effort for the day. His line when it was all said and done was five innings, five hits, three runs, two walks, four strike outs, and two home runs. For Milton, not bad at all.

Lopez led off the bottom of the fifth with a walk. After Aurilia popped out to the short stop and Griffey flied out to right field, Lopez stole second while Adam Dunn was batting. Dunn then promptly hit a double to center field, scoring Lopez and making the score 3-4.

Mike Burns took over in the sixth to knock down three Pirates in a row. The Reds went down similarly in the bottom of the inning.

The Pirates' Sanchez sacrificed in a run in the seventh to tie up the score at fours, but this time the Reds didn't answer.

Chris Hammond came in in the top of the eighth inning. He struck out Craig Wilson on a pitch that measured 80 mph by the radar gun of the scout in front of us. Mike Edwards singled just over Lopez' head and advanced on a wild pitch while Ronnie Paulino was batting. Paulino singled to center taking the runner to third. Matt Meath hit to third, getting Wilson in a rundown between third and home. Three throws later, Lopez dropped the ball and the runner was safe at third. Nick Theodorou grounded to third where Frank Menechino touched the base and threw to first to end the Pirates' threat.

Things got interesting in the bottom of the eighth when Griffey doubled to deep right field. Griffey went to third and Dunn reached first on a swinging strike three when the ball got away from the catcher. Ryan Freel came in to pinch run for Dunn. Jacob Cruz struck out but provided the opportunity for Freel to steal second. The Pirates intentionally walked Hatteberg to load the bases and get to Austin Kearns. Then, while Kearns was batting, a passed ball allowed the runners to advance, including Griffey coming home to get lead: 4-5. Kearns went on to draw the walk and again load up the bases for David Ross to let fly a 2-RBI single to center field. Menechino grounded into a double play to end the inning with the Reds up, 4-7.

Mercker came in in the top of the ninth to safeguard the lead. He induced a broken-bat ground out from Nate McLouth, gave up a single to Duffy, but got Sanchez to ground into a double play to put a win in the books for Cincinnati and set up the mood for the fireworks extravaganza that followed the game.

The win brings the Reds' record to 17-11 and ensures a winning spring for our boys. Tonight they host the Boston Red Sox in Sarasota.

The Reds lost to the Indians by a score of 9-4 on Sunday in Winter Haven. The Reds did not enjoy the services of Ken Griffey, Jr., Adam Dunn, or Jason LaRue for this game, possibly because the Indians have the worst spring training facilities I've ever seen. That's certainly the reason they did not enjoy the services of me.

Brandon Claussen got the start and struggled through his four innings of work. He allowed six runs (four earned) on eight hits. He also had seven strike outs, which doesn't seem to jibe with the rest of those numbers. Perhaps a testament to how many batters he faced in his time on the mound?

Todd Coffey, Brian Shackelford, Jake Robbins, and Matt Belisle each pitched an inning of relief. Everyone went scoreless except Robbins who allowed three runs (one earned).

Austin Kearns was hit by pitches twice to go with his home run off Danny Graves. Brian Buchanan knocked in two and Quinton McCracken knocked in one for the Reds' total four runs. Four was also the number of Reds' errors, two coming from Edwin Encarnación, and one apiece from Jeff Bannon and Matt Kata.

The Reds' record after the loss was 16-11. They would come home to Sarasota to host the Pirates on Monday.