December 3, 2006


A real wiffleball playerAmong the many features of Redsfest 2006 was the indoor wiffleball field, where real-live grown-ups played real-live wiffleball on a real-live indoor/outdoor carpet.

I didn't watch much of the wiffleball tournament, but when I caught glimpses, I noticed a striking difference in skill. One team seemed to just keep batting around, another seemed like they just couldn't get the hang of a hollow plastic bat and ball with holes in it.

I'm not sure which would be more embarrassing.

Wiffleball pitching machine: a must-haveThe best part is that, after the tournament was complete, the program actually showed general access to the wiffleball diamond for even us non-homemade-team-shirt-wearing plebeians.

Thankfully for everyone involved, the wiffleball diamond featured a device you probably didn't know existed, and will soon discover you cannot live without: a wiffleball pitching machine. Just think of it: gone are the days of lobbing a wiffleball 15 feet in the air to make the vertical distance of eight feet between you and the batter, only to have the wind pick it up halfway there and send it into the neighbor's yard! Finally, a wiffleball moving in a more-or-less straight line!

Two very large jerseysWhat will they think of next??

Hanging high above the wiffleball diamond were enormous jerseys to demonstrate the new team look if Ray King were on the team. The CTS took these photos well before the fashion show, so if I'd been on my game, we could have been showing off the new threads a whole hour earlier than we did.

One very large jerseyBut it's probably better that we didn't. There's got to be some privilege for the people who skip work to go to Redsfest.

4 comments to “Wiffleball”

  1. kid10pitch says:

    I am upset by your total lack of knowledge about wiffle. To think that it’s a “kids game” or “not competitve” would be very naive of you. Let me know when you’re ready to step up to the plate sucka.

  2. kid10pitch says:

    You might need a new digital camera…seems like you’re having trouble shooting indoors

  3. Red Hot Mama says:

    Welcome kid10pitch! It’s a pleasure to have you here.

    You’ve seen right through me, of course. If I deride wiffleball, it is only because my own wiffle skills are subpar. Nevertheless, I’d love to play if someone were to get a game together. Maybe next year RHM could have a team in the tourney.

    Or–ooh!–I could get a big mascot costume and go up against Gapper and the blood drop in the mascot wiffleball game!

  4. Red Hot Mama says:

    P.S. The camera *is* new. I think that’s the problem. Either that, or I need a new crack photography staff.