Once again, Red Hot Mama has been fortunate enought to sit down with a Red, this time it was Jacob Cruz, to ask him eight stupid questions about his favorite things.

RHM: Jacob, you have a very cute dog. What are her favorite toys?
JC: Sometimes she chews shoes.

RHM: What are your favorite female farm animals and creatures from Australia?
JC: I think I'll go with ewes and kangaroos.

RHM: Favorite place to take a nap?
JC: I like to snooze in zoos.

RHM: What's your favorite way to travel down a river?
JC: If I had to choose, I'd use canoes.

RHM: Favorite thing about teammate Felipe Lopez?
JC: Tough question, but you can't lose with the tattoos.

RHM: Favorite way to use herbs?
JC: They're the only way to infuse stews.

RHM: Favorite pastime after a game?
JC: I turn on the t.v. and peruse news.

RHM: Favorite children's show that features an atypically colorful dog?
JC: Clifford. What?

The day that saw the seventh win of the Reds' 10-game home series was the kind of day that meteorologists describe as “hotter'n hell.”

It started off discouragingly enough when Luke “Also Hotter'n Hell” Hudson put in the kind of inning that belied the rest of his quality start. Fortunately, a well-timed double play allowed Hudson to escape the top of the first down by just one run. In the bottom of the first, the first eight strikes went by before a batter swung, and that was Sean “No Double Play, No Double Play, Oh Darn” Casey grounding out to third. Things were not looking promising for the Reds.

A whole lot of nothing went on for the next two and a half innings while the tension built for Austin “On a Program” Kearns' dramatic home run with Casey on base to give the Reds the 2-1 lead. Adam “That's How It's” Dunn and Wily Mo “I Already Have Three Names; I Don't Need You Sticking More Words in Quotes” Peña struck out, which still left an out in the inning for Edwin “I'm Ready, No Really” Encarnación to get his first hit since he's been back with the Reds, a double that would leave him on second to end the inning.

The Brewers would come back to tie the game when Brady “I Have Two First Names” Clark singled in a run, but that would be the last of Milwalkee's scoring, and in fact, all of the scoring until the bottom of the ninth. That's when Adam “I Can Too Hit in the Clutch” Dunn took the 2-2 pitch deep to right field to lead the Reds in walking off with the win.

Besides those already explicitly listed, Ryan “Pigpen” Freel, Casey, Jason “Texas Love Machine” LaRue, and Hudson each also contributed a hit to bring the Reds' hit total to seven.

Tomorrow the Reds head to Los Angeles to take on the Dodgers. Aaron “Azriel Abyss” Harang will lead the charge as the Reds try to take some of the Cincinnati heat with them on the road.

Stop whatever you're doing and prepare to finish your Christmas shopping five months early!

I'm pleased to announce that my crack technical support team, with help from my crack graphical design team, has set up a CafePress store for Red Hot Mama. Point your browser to

http://www.cafepress.com/redhotmama

or click the randomly selected image of a product on the right.

As long as I'm pretending tonight's 11-7 travesty to the Brewers didn't happen, I'll also mention the addition of We Heart The Reds to the Reds blog links on the left. It's nice not to be the only one talking about players' hair for a change.

Since I am apparently the last person on earth to find out, you probably already know that Fan Favorite Joe Randa has been traded to the San Diego Padres for a couple right-handed starting pitchers, Justin Germano and Travis Chick. Edwin Encarnación has been called up to take his stead.

Over the course of the season I have talked a lot about the joker, all of it plesant. He's been a big inspiration to me and my most closely guarded baseball crush. He appeared in RHM's second fake news story ever. In fact, here's a whole list of fake news stories in which he appeared:

• Randa Changes Name to Human Highlights Reel
• Reds Stand Up to Sit for Aurilia
• New Reds Release Frustration on Casey
• Eight Stupid Questions for Joe Randa

Randa has been great fun and a great contributor, and I couldn't be more pleased for him or us. May his future hold much love, luck, and lollipops.

I thought I'd use my headline tonight to give you a preview of what every Reds media outlets' headlines are going to say in the morning.

The Reds 11-6 win over the Brewers was delayed for 25 minutes in the seventh inning when a transformer blew and took out power to Great American Ball Park. That isn't something I've heard of happening before. Do you think people were taking advantage of the darkness to pick each other's pockets? Punch the loud, annoying drunk people sitting behind them? Conceive new Reds fans?

I didn't hear the whole game, so I can't really do a proper wrap, but I had plenty of somewhat connected thoughts, so bullets are still in order:

• Weird, ugly line-up tonight. And that's all I'll say since it worked.
• Javier Valentín went 2-for-4 with a 2-run double but no home runs. He's clearly slumping. He will not play tomorrow.
• Jason LaRue, according to this article at CR:TOS, didn't know he wouldn't be playing today. Apparently Narron thought LaRue would have read it in the paper. When it comes to scolding the Reds management, I'll usually let something go on pretty long before I say anything, but not this time. Lack of communication has been a huge problem for this team all year, and one I was counting on Narron to improve. Direct and open communication within the team is too important to let slip. Don't let's let this happen again, understood?
• Felipe Lopez and Joe Randa each contributed a home run tonight. They rock. But you already knew that.
• Adam Dunn, after his brief flirtation with suckitude at the plate last night, was moved down one spot from fifth to sixth in the line-up, where he came through with a couple home runs on three hits tonight. Go Dunn.
• Austin Kearns, after contributing three hits and two RBI last night, was moved down THREE spots from fourth to seventh in the line-up, where he still enjoyed a couple hits. To be fair, though, he did get some pretty good protection with The Latin Love Machine hitting behind him in the eight slot.
• If Marc Lancaster's intuition is to be believed, then the Reds will come out after the non-waiver trade deadline exactly according to my recommendations. Seriously: I need to start charging for this stuff. Also, Marc titled his entry “Lo Siento Mucho.” Apparently I'm not the only one who speaks Spanish around here.

Tomorrow, Brandon Claussen tries to put in a significantly better performance than last time to keep this winning streak a'rolling. It's Sean Casey figurine night, so if the pattern holds, Casey's gonna have a heck of a game. Better start lining up now to get your hands on one of the plastic miniatures: they're only giving away 40,000 of them.

Go Reds!

The complete team did anyway. Reds-minus-Freel-Kearns-and-Valentín didn't fare as well, I hear.

Wasn't that a great game today? Really, what more could you want? It had leads and deficits. Big, bad villains and tiny little heroes. A HoF-caliber pitcher and Milton.

You could just feel the intensity coming through MLB's GameDay like heat off a flame. Not the least of which coming from this fella right here:

Wouldn't you just love to have that image on a t-shirt, coffee mug, and mouse pad? I wonder what I would need to do to make that happen legally and benefit from it financially.

I know I've already given our backup catcher an awful lot of attention lately, but I don't see how I can avoid giving him yet more props. In fact, if he keeps up this pace, Red Hot Mama will eventually have no choice other than to just become a Javier Valentín fan blog, complete with fake headlines such as:

Valentín Brothers To Release Husky Boy Clothing Line

'The Javy' the Hottest Trend In Facial Hair

and

Javier Valentín: Half the Height, Twice the Love

All this and great merchandise, too. Really, what more could you want?

CINCINNATI, OH -- This is the true story of 40 baseball players, picked to play in an Ohio club and have their lives secretly taped, and find out what happens when people stop being polite and start getting real.

At least that's the word from an anonymous source close to the project. According to the source, the Fox Network and the Cincinnati Reds entered into an agreement before the 2005 season to covertly collect footage for a reality show to air this fall. The program was to be called The Making of a Winner and the producers were hopeful that it would be a natural segue program to premiere immediately after the World Series.

However, when the high hopes of spring training failed to translate to a winning season, the Reds looked elsewhere for the provacative interactions typical of reality television, and struck programming gold.

The new format, working title The New Biggest Loser, will feature secret footage taken of highly charged interpersonal situations orchestrated by the Reds management. Highlights include the heart-wrenching separation and jubilant reunion of Adam Dunn and Austin Kearns, the awkward interaction of D'Angelo Jimenez and Ryan Freel at AA Chattanooga, and the jettisoning and eventual decent into madness of Danny Graves.

The program will also feature Scooter, Fox Sports' animated baseball character, as the narrator.

The New Biggest Loser will premiere next month and will air on Wednesdays at 9 p.m.

Today we say farewell to Jason Romano, who elected free agency over accepting assignment to AAA Louisville.

And as we bid him well, we say goodbye to more than just an adequate backup; we also sad goodbye to a friend. And a smoking hottie.

Let's take just one more opportunity to enjoy the scenery, shall we?
So Pretty
Pretty AND Sweet

::contented sigh::

OK, that being said, the slot for hottest Red is again open. Watching the game tonight, I want to nominate Luke Hudson, but he actually looks quite a bit like Romano, and we might be ready to go a completely different direction. Wily Mo or Austin Kearns, for example, because these two must always be in competition.

I'm accepting nominations. Ought to be a fun contest to judge.

Here are some selected stats for Javier Valentín compared for the following two time periods:

• From the beginning of the 2005 season to 11:15 p.m., May 27, 2005
• From 11:15 p.m., May 27, 2005 to this very moment

What happened at 11:15 p.m. on May 27, 2005, you ask?

Why, that's the first time RHM published the phrase “Latin Love Machine” in an official post.

Just sayin'.

JAVY!

Demmit, Wily Mo: you get on in the eighth and he gets two grand slams.