June 17, 2006

Mismanagement, Bullpen Woes, and Dunn Vie for Attention

CINCINNATI, OH -- Continuing a string of questionable managing decisions tonight, Jerry Narron pinch hit for Felipe Lopez in the bottom of the ninth inning with Juan Castro.

“I don't understand why everyone's so upset,” said Narron. “He's a late-inning replacement, right?” said Narron.

The Reds acquired Castro from the Minnesota Twins on Thursday for minor leaguer Brandon Roberts.

“I wanted to use [Quinton] McCracken, but he'd already struck out,” explained Narron.

Bullpen to the DL
Taking a cue from struggling starter Brandon Claussen, the entire bullpen has begun complaining of shoulder soreness. They've all been diagnosed with rotator cuff inflammation and will go on the 15-day DL.

“They've been hurt all along,” said Head Trainer Mark Mann, “they were just trying to stick it out for the good of the team.”

In their places will come up Brian Shackelford, Jason Standridge, Ryan Wagner, Jake Robbins, and Michael Gosling.

“Maybe they'll make us appreciate Rick White,” said Mann.

Dunn Steals the Show
Adam Dunn jumped up and down flailing his arms and spouting stupid jokes earlier today when something happened that would have put an uncomfortable amount of media attention on Ken Griffey, Jr. The event that would have caused the attention was immediately forgotten as the press crowded around to report on Dunn's antics.

It's a skill Dunn has honed to perfection. Recently he drew attention from Griffey's response to a comment by Eric Davis that Griffey should move to a corner field position. Dunn implied that he didn't know who Davis was and distracted the media, allowing Griffey to go on pretending the comment had never happened.

“I'll want him around next time I make a pitching change,” said Narron of Dunn.

2 comments to “Mismanagement, Bullpen Woes, and Dunn Vie for Attention”

  1. Zeldink says:

    Very funny. I especially like the part about Dunn. I can’t believe how many people didn’t realize that his comment concerning Eric Davis was a joke. I mean, it’s not like he has [url=http://www.red-hot-mama.com/humanleague/comments.php?id=556_0_3_0_C19]a history of being a smart-ass[/url] or anything.

  2. Red Hot Mama says:

    Glad you enjoyed it, Zeldink. People probably didn’t realize that Dunn’s comment was a joke because it wasn’t all that funny.